Techonologically Stupidly Advanced

Lyon Keating:

Technologically Stupid Advanced

“So at what point do we just not have to use our bodies because it is inefficient or whatever?” I said as I packed a bowl.

“Well isn’t that the point.  I mean, we’re humans and the basis of our survival and adaptation to your environment have been through the use of tools as the ions have passed.  If you don’t use those tools you get left behind,” stated Lilly.

“And that’s the sorry state of it all.  If you don’t use the tools that seem to be constantly ever changing then one day you wake up and realize you can’t really communicate with anybody.  I don’t have a twitter, or a Facebook, or a smart phone to text for that matter, and I’m suddenly being left out.  Since when do we make inventions in our society where a few years pass and then a huge portion of the population gets left out of the cool cats communication club.” Mentioned Philly Mike.

“C’mon get with it?  What’s your problem man?  How come you don’t modernize yourself and get those things,” spouted Lilly.

“Well it’s not like anybody returns my calls anyway.  Why would I throw myself out there more if nobody ever really bothers to pick up the phone to even call me back?”

“Alert to Mike, that’s your freaking problem dude.  Nobody uses their phones to actually talk anymore.  Conversation takes place sparingly through condensed text conversations and Facebook postings.  Conversations are to the point and relevant to all our lives, but most importantly, easily accessible.  People aren’t probably even listening to your lame voice mails.  It’s a hassle to take the time to listen and then even more of a hassle to actually call someone back vs. casually looking at some text that says it all.  People have only very few moments nowadays to spend time talking to people other than their close family members and maybe one or two friends on occasion.  The bulk of their communication lies within the convenience of communicating throughout their day when it is convenient for them.  Are you so selfish to expect that people should call you back?  If that were the case then we would have no time for anything else then actually making sure we talk to people on the phone, which would be even more nerve-wracking because people would constantly be on their cell phones, which I know everyone finds annoying.”

“Well shoot me for liking to hear people’s voices.  Being about thirty years older than you Lilly and Lyon I value that.  Just how one day you’ll value texting somebody vs. just sending them a message through a telepathic device attached to your brain or through glasses you wear.  I went in search of my old letters the other day from the early days of my marriage and actually found them.  They were stamped, with dates on them, personalized with handwriting.  I remember receiving them when I was in the military and getting one was like receiving a light from a distant star.  Time had passed since it was written but that letter represented a ray of light that was current to me and very meaningful because it was a thought and idea that preserved in somebody’s mind when both parties knew that it was impossible to get in touch in the present.  It wasn’t like an email that is sent and forgotten about almost instantly after it is written because we have eight million other ways to get back to a person instantly nowadays.  Thoughts stuck more back then.  I don’t know, call me romantic, but it’s something that was positive.”

“Mike you can always write me letters and I’ll wipe them on my ass and then when you get them back from me you’ll know that’s what my asshole smelled like after about a week…and Lyon what the fuck is taking you so long to pack that bowl?”

“Dude sorry I went with the vaporizer instead and need to break up the green in little specs and then heat up the vaporizer.”

“Whatever happened to smoking the good old fashioned stuff through a six foot bong like we did in the seventies.  This generation is a bunch of pussies and this is coming from a hippy,” said Philly Mike.

“Yeah I want to feel the burn of the marijuana flowing through my lungs and to blow out the smoke.  I want to smell it!”

“So you both want your lungs to look like the bottom of a resin covered, black bong?  I personally would rather not smoke over burned ash.  Vaporizers are absolutely healthier for you and concentrate the positive effects that we all love so much from kron and take out the negative stuff.  But fine, if you insist I’ll pack both.”

“You’re damn right I insist on it.  I didn’t decide to spend my afternoon with you asses just talking about the beauty of writing letters.  I want to feel like I got stoned rather than guess because I can’t smell it or see the smoke,” said Lilly.

“It sounds like you’d get stoned if I put Oregano in here instead of pot if it smelled the same.  The vaporizer actually hits better. You just have to use your higher order thinking skills and not overly rely on the things you associate with getting stoned to get you stoned.  I know it might be a little too tough for that noggin of yours to handle…Okay here you go.  Here’s your black end of the bong smoking pipe.  Mike, you want the clean high or the dirty sluts asshole one?

“Duh, the slut.”

“So back to what you guys were talking about now that thc has opened up my brain a little bit on the matter.  Many moons ago in a generation far far away, actually probably your generation Philly Mike, people were thought to be wasting their lives by talking away in their rooms with this new little device called the phone.  How dare it take away from face to face communication and how can you really communicate with someone over the phone?  Even before that, go back even farther, and you have things like written words and books taking away from people just telling you stories.  Of all things, the BOOK, was the original smart phone in a way.  It shifted our reliance from gathering information from people in a face to face manner to using a device that summarized what they were saying.  How is the pursuit nowadays with new devices any different than these old things?”

“Okay, well only that they have exaggerated their presence exponentially in taking away from the human interaction.  A book won’t turn most people into outrageous introverts as a result.  People won’t carry a book around with them and check it every two minutes and be distracted from conversation because they are reading it.  An iPhone and Facebook is single handedly turning a generation of kids into one where they pay attention more to their devices than they do to people.  Isn’t it troubling to think that we are quickly heading to a place where people might not ever really talk in person to each other?  Technology nowadays doesn’t promote meaningful conversations,” observes Mike.

“I don’t think it’s troubling at all.  Bring on the terminator two perspective era!” as Lilly blows smoke into my face.

“Yes, I see your point Mike and unfortunately a lot of younger kids are getting lost in their devices but how do you regulate that?  If you regulated that I think that would be worse and completely corrupt in itself.  On the surface, people will seem to have far less personable relationships but with having a wider web of friends to text and Facebook they will in essence be setting themselves up for more random hangouts.  They will have more of a pool to choose from to see and stay in touch with.  In the past when we didn’t have these social networking tools we just stopped seeing people and most of the time never bothered to keep in touch.  I don’t see many of the important people in my life that much but my smart phone makes me able to casually communicate with them so I will in essence be able to possibly find out about how to see them more, and when I do see them I will feel somewhat knowledgeable about their lives and have things to talk about.”

“I think that’s you Lyon.  I don’t know if most people view these things as such and remember you and Lilly were the last generation to come from an era that didn’t have the internet or cell phones.  These new devices are going to have their way with the young-ins who have no other perspective.”

“I’ll agree somewhat but I think you’re committing the classic old person mistake of thinking the younger generation is doomed and not as capable as the previous ones.  Have some faith.  People figure it out.  I’m sure your dad thought your generation was doomed.”

“And prime example number one.  Ever since we started smoking here Ms. Lilly has been on her smart phone texting away.”

“I’m not texting, I’m popping bubbles.”

“Popping bubbles, what’s that?” Asked Mike.

“It’s an app where bubbles come down on the screen and you see how many bubbles you can pop.”

“Holy shit!  You’re an asshole and exactly what I’m talking about!  Sorry we are hanging out and interrupting your quest to pop bubbles,” pronounces Philly Mike.

“There you go again being selfish.  So since I have nothing to say and am not talking to you, you get offended?  Should I go and write you a handwritten letter?  The point of this conversation shouldn’t be about what’s happening to the youth but what’s happening to the older generation who can’t handle getting attention in the ways they aren’t used to.  Welcome to the wonderful world of multi-tasking.  You’re off your rocker.”

“I don’t know about you but I think we should be sitting around writing hand written letters in our best cursive, haha!” I said

“The feeling is ever the same with you young folk.  Adjust or get the fuck out of the way and left behind.  No respect.  You’ll be old one day too and know how it feels when things keep changing at the pace that caters to twenty-two year olds.  I can’t help but feel shat on constantly,” mumbles Mike.

“That’s because you got to stop reading those shit letters Lilly is sending you.  Here take a hit of the clean stuff will ya and feel what it’s like to live in a world where pot doesn’t make you want to sit around and pop bubbles with your day.”

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